"Who Are You Responsible To?" – A Blueprint for Belonging, Responsibility, and Respect

There’s a quiet frustration that builds when you're walking a path of service, especially when working with young people. You see their brilliance, their questions, their fire—and you feel called to guide them. But there’s also a tension. A generation that’s constantly told the world revolves around them often struggles to see beyond their own immediate needs.

This message is for them. For us. For anyone who's forgotten—or never been taught—that there’s a method to the madness, an order to the chaos, and that responsibility doesn’t come without structure.

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Concentric Circles: A System of Self and Service

In the Gye-Nyame Self-Mastery system, everything starts with the individual—the self. But the self doesn’t exist in isolation. The self is connected to larger circles: family, tribe, community, and so on. Each layer expands your responsibility and your support system. But here’s the key: You only have the right to expect from a circle that you actively contribute to.

So, ask yourself:

• What community do I belong to?

• How do I serve it?

• What sacrifices am I making for that group?

• What value, mastery, or expertise do I bring to the table?

You don’t get to demand answers, respect, or resources from a circle you’re not contributing to. Belonging is not a passive condition—it’s an active relationship. And with that relationship comes reciprocity.

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“Nobody Will Respect Your Sh*t More Than You.”

I told a young brother that recently. He was fasting for Ramadan… until his stomach hurt. And while I respect anyone's pain, I had to remind him: If you don’t respect your own commitments, how can you expect others to?

Pain is not always a signal to stop. Sometimes, it’s the very thing designed to help you refocus. That discomfort? It’s a mirror. It reflects whether your actions are in alignment with your values—or if you're just mimicking someone else's rituals without understanding the reason behind them.

So, I asked: Why are you fasting? What’s the story behind it? He didn’t know. And that’s when it hit me: Many of us walk through life acting out rituals with no understanding of their roots. We belong to communities—families, faiths, tribes—but we don’t know their story. We wear the labels, but haven’t earned the meaning.

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Know the Lore, Know Your Worth

Whatever group you’re a part of—whether it’s your family, your faith, your tribe—know the story. Know why it exists. Know why you belong. Know what makes it powerful, sacred, or unique. Because when you do, you’ll develop a deeper respect for it. And in turn, you’ll build a deeper respect for yourself.

That kind of knowing changes you. It shifts your worldview from being me-centered to being we-centered. And this shift is necessary. Not just for young folks, but for adults too—especially those still moving like the world owes them something, without ever investing in the people around them.

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The Hard Truth: You’re Not Owed Anything You Haven’t Earned

Here’s where it gets uncomfortable. You don’t get to show up in someone’s life, community, or institution and demand they drop everything to meet your needs—especially if you haven’t proven your commitment to them. Reciprocity isn’t automatic. You must earn the right to be heard, to be seen, to be served.

And for those of us guiding the next generation: we need to model this. We need to embody it. Because the world is not short on brilliant individuals. It’s short on those willing to make the sacrifices required to turn brilliance into legacy.

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Closing Thought: What Story Are You Living?

This ain’t just about a lesson for the youth. It’s a reminder for all of us. Are we living as if we’re the center of the universe? Or are we living as members of something greater?

The circle only supports what it can feel beating at its center. If you’re not bringing your energy, your sacrifice, your love—then don’t expect to be sustained by it.

Belonging is earned. And when you earn it, there is nothing more powerful than a tribe that hears you, sees you, and fights for you.